How Hollywood is pitching Election 2000

From modernhumorist.com

One Hollywood exec said he wouldnt be surprised if the movie rights to the election of the century were already being negotiated. Its got all the ingredients—a mysterious electoral college, weird tabulating procedures, missing ballots, lawsuits—as well as photogenic lead characters.

– Variety


Dir. M. Night Shyamalan

In this supernatural thriller from the creator of The Sixth Sense, an election is not what it seems. Gore (Bruce Willis) is haunted by the memory of losing Palm Beach County by a narrow margin. His son, Al Gore III (Brad Renfro) tells him, I see missing ballots. An election law expert (Samuel L. Jackson) tries to find the truth. Please do not reveal the surprise ending (Gov. Carnahan is dead!).

How the Grinch Stole the Election

Dir. Ron Howard

Ralph Nader (Abe Vigoda) plots to steal away as many votes as possible from the gentle Gores in Goreville (Tennessee). Aided by loyal Cindy Lou-Who (Ani Difranco), Nader-Grinch seeks to confuse the voting populace with his tales of giant corporations and government corruption.

Voter in the Dark

Dir. Lars von Trier

An elderly Florida woman (Bjork) gradually loses her eyesight while casting the deciding Palm Beach vote.

Armageddon 2

Dir. Michael Bay. Prod. Jerry Bruckheimer

Fade in: The terrorist bombing of the USS Cole ($30 million). Cut to: A retirement community in Palm Beach, Florida, which explodes ($25 million). Cut to: Al Gore (Nicolas Cage) and George W. Bush (Ving Rhames) engaged in martial-arts combat atop the U.S. Capitol ($16 million). Fade out to end credits ($11 million).

The Presidential Erection

Writ. Joe Ezterhas

A Miami stripper (Yasmine Bleeth) becomes involved in an erotic triangle with two presidential candidates (David Caruso and Kyle MacLachlan). On the eve of the election, she chooses her allegiance to one, and the other demands a recount.

Untitled Woody Allen Fall 2000 Project

Al Gore (Stanley Tucci), a neurotic presidential candidate, has to take stock of his life when his rival (Sean Penn) wins the election. But a strange fortuneteller (Judy Davis) helps Gore go back in time and teach comical Jewish retirees how to fill out their ballots correctly. Only after Gore falls in love with a beautiful but klutzy ballot designer (Natasha Lyonne) does he find true happiness.

Plan 9 From Palm Beach

Dir. Ed Wood

Aliens, posing as chads, try to take over the democratic process by re-animating the residents of Palm Beach retirement condos. Starring Bela Lugosi as George W. Bush, Tor Johnson as Karl Rove and a piece of aluminum-covered cardboard dangling from a string as Al Gore.

Also in production:

A Few Good Democrats

Dir. Rob Reiner, Prod. Harvey Weinstein

Theres Something About Cheney

Dir. Bobby and Peter Farrelly

Jing Cha Gu Shi (a.k.a. Ballot Attack Fury)

Dir. Jackie Chan

The Infected Boil

Dir. David Cronenberg

The Disputed Hole (a.k.a. The Swinging Chad)

Dir. Phillip Kaufman

This film is rated NC-17.

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