How To Screw Up An Interview

Weve all been interviewed for jobs. And, weve all spent most of those interviews thinking about what not to do. Dont bite your nails. Dont fidget. Dont interrupt. Dont belch.

If we did any of the donts, we knew wed disqualify ourselves instantly. But some job applicants go light years beyond this. We surveyed top personnel executives of 100 major American corporations and asked for stories of unusual behavior by job applicants. The lowlights:

1. … stretched out on the floor to fill out the job application.

2. She wore a Walkman and said she could listen to me and the music at the same time.

3. A balding candidate abruptly excused himself. Returned to office a few minutes later, wearing a hairpiece.

4. … asked to see interviewers resume to see if the personnel executive was qualified to judge the candidate.

5. … announced she hadnt had lunch and proceeded to eat a hamburger and french fries in the interviewers office – wiping the ketchup on her sleeve

6. Stated that, if he were hired, he would demonstrate his loyalty by having the corporate logo tattooed on his forearm.

7. Interrupted to phone his therapist for advice on answering specific interview questions.

8. When I asked him about his hobbies, he stood up and started tap dancing around my office.

9 . At the end of the interview, while I stood there dumbstruck, went through my purse, took out a brush, brushed his hair, and left.

10. … pulled out a Polaroid camera and snapped a flash picture of me. Said he collected photos of everyone who interviewed him.

11. Said he wasnt interested because the position paid too much.

12. While I was on a long-distance phone call, the applicant took out a copy of Penthouse, and looked through the photos only, stopping longest at the centerfold.

13. During the interview, an alarm clock went off from the candidates brief case. He took it out, shut it off, apologized and said he had to leave for another interview.

14. A telephone call came in for the job applicant. It was from his wife. His side of the conversation went like this: Which company? When do I start? Whats the salary?

I said, I assume youre not interested in conducting the interview any further. He promptly responded, I am as long as youll pay me more.

15. His attache [case] opened when he picked it up and the contents spilled, revealing ladies undergarments and assorted makeup and perfume.

16. Candidate said he really didnt want to get a job, but the unemployment office needed proof that he was looking for one.

17. … asked who the lovely babe was, pointing to the picture on my desk. When I said it was my wife, he asked if she was home now and wanted my phone number. I called security.

18. Pointing to a black case he carried into my office, he said that if he was not hired, the bomb would go off. Disbelieving, I began to state why he would never be hired and that I was going to call the police. He then reached down to the case, flipped a switch and ran. No one was injured, but I did need to get a new desk.

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