Old and New Jokes

If Microsoft Built Cars…



1. A particular model year of car wouldnt be available until after that year instead of before it.



2. Every time they repainted the lines on the road, youd have to buy a new car.



3. Occasionally your car would just die for no reason, and youd have to restart it. For some strange reason, youd just accept this.



4. You could only have one person in the car at a time, unless you bought a Car 95 or a Car NT. But then youd have to buy more seats.



5. Sun Motorsystems would make a car that was powered by the sun, twice as reliable, and five times as fast – but it would only run on 5 percent of the roads.



6. The oil, engine, gas, and alternator warning lights would be replaced with a single General Car Fault warning light.



7. People would get excited about the new features in Microsoft cars, forgetting completely that they had been available in other cars for years.



8. Wed all have to switch to Microsoft gas.



9. The U.S. government would be GETTING subsidies from an automaker, instead of giving them.



10. New seats would force everyone to have the same-size butt.