Old and New Jokes

A farmer ordered a high-tech milking machine.

Since the equipment arrived when his wife was out of town, he decided to test it on himself first. So, he inserted his penis into the equipment, turned the switch on and . . . everything else was automatic!



Soon, he realized that the equipment provided him with as much pleasure as his wife did. When the fun was over, though, he quickly realized that he couldnt remove the instrument from his penis.



He read the manual but didnt find any useful information. He tried every button on the instrument, but still without success.



Finally, the farmer decided to call the suppliers Customer Service Hot Line. Hello, I just bought a milking machine from your company. It works fantastic, but how do I remove it from the cows udder?



Dont worry, replied the customer service rep, the machine was programmed to release automatically once its collected two gallons of milk.