Old and New Jokes

NOTE: This application will be incomplete and rejected unless accompanied by a complete financial statement, job history, lineage and current medical report from your doctor. Please be prepared to submit additional information (like psychological profile and polygraph test) as required.——————————————————-
Name:___________________________Date of Birth:______________________
Height:____________ Weight:____________ I.Q.___________ GPA:_________
Social Security Number:___________________ Drivers License #:____________
Boy Scout Rank:___________________________________________________
Home Address:____________________________ City:____________________
State:____________________________ Zip Code:_______________________ How far can you run: 40 yards?_______________ 2 miles?___________________
Do you own a (A)Van?____ (B)Truck with oversized tires?_____ (C)Waterbed?_____
Do you have an earing, nose ring or belly button ring?__________ Tatoo?_________
NOTE: If you answered YES to any part of questions #8, discontinue the
application process and leave the premises!In 50 words or less, what does LATE mean to you?__________________________
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In 50 words or less, what does DONT TOUCH MY DAUGHTER mean to you?__
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In 50 words or less, what does ABSTINENCE mean to you?__________________
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Church you Attend:___________________ How often do you attend?____________
When would be the best time to interview your father, mother and minister?_________
Answer by filling in the blanks. Please answer freely. All answers are confidential.
(That means I wont tell anyone, ever)
If I were shot, the last place on my body I would want to be wounded is the__________.
If I were beaten, the last bone I wou