Old and New Jokes

Six guys were playing poker when Smith loses $500 on a single hand, clutches his chest and drops dead at the table. Showing respect for their fallen comrade, the other five complete their playing time standing up.Roberts looks around and asks, Now, who is going to tell the wife? They draw straws. Rippington, who is always a loser, picks the short one. They tell him to be discreet, be gentle, dont make a bad situation any worse than it is.Gentlemen! Discreet? Im the most discreet man you will ever meet. Discretion is my middle name, leave it to me. Rippington walks over to the Smith house, knocks on the door, the wife answers, asks what he wants.Rippington says, Your husband just lost $500 playing cards.She hollers, TELL HIM TO DROP DEAD!Rippington says, Ill tell him.