Life of a Senior Citizen…

Im the life of the party…even when it lasts till 8 p.m.

Im very good at opening child-proof caps with a hammer.

Im usually interested in going home before I get to where Im going.

Im good on a trip for at least an hour without my aspirin, beano, & antacid.

Im awake many hours before my body allows me to get up.

Im smiling all the time because I cant hear a word you are saying.

Im aware that other peoples grandchildren are not as bright as mine.

Im so cared for: Long term care, Eye care, Private care, Dental care . . .

Im not grouchy, I just dont like traffic, waiting, crowds, children, politicians.

Im sure everything I cant find is in a secure place.

Im wrinkled, saggy and bumpy and thats just my left leg.

Im realizing that aging is not for sissies.

Im anti-everything now: Anti-fat, Anti-smoke, Anti-noise, Anti-inflammatory

Im going to reveal what goes on behind closed doors . . .Absolutely nothing!

Im sure they are making adults much younger these days.

Im in the initial stage of my golden years: SS, CDs, IRAs, AARP. . .

Im wondering . . If youre only as old as you feel, how could I be alive at 150?

Im supporting all movements now . . .by eating bran, prunes and raisins.

Im a walking storeroom of facts . . .Ive just lost the storeroom.