1. Twice this week youve been the victim of a drive-by doilying.
2. The unmistakable aroma of potpourri follows you even after you leave the bathroom.
3. On her show, she makes a gingerbread house that looks exactly like your split-level, right down to the fallen-over licorice downspout and the stuck half-open graham cracker garage door.
4. That telltale lemon slice in the dogs water bowl.
5. You get a threatening note made up of letters out of a magazine with pinking shears, and theyre all the same size, the same font, and precisely
lined up in razor-sharp rows.
6. You find your pet bunny on the stove in an exquisite tarragon, rose petal and saffron demi-glace, with pecan-crusted hearts of palm and a delicate mint-fennel sauce.
7. You discover that every napkin in the entire house has been folded into a swan.
8. No matter where you eat, your place setting
always includes an oyster fork.9. You wake up in the hospital with a concussion and endive stuffing in every orifice.
10. You awaken one morning with a glue gun pointed squarely at your temple.
18
May
Additional Jokes From "General / Unsorted"
- How to use an ATM machine…
- At the blood donor clinic
- The Boy Who Wrote To God
- New Programming Language: C + –
- Afrer heart attack
- Few occupational hazards
- X-Files: The science adviser to whaaat?
- Knock, Knock
- Bill Collector
- Jobs and Work joke #11019
- After 3 husbands – still virgin (Risque)
- Dont Ask . . . Dont Tell . . .
- Survey on italian men
- Smoke rings
- Clinton Strikes again