Old and New Jokes

Now I lay me down to sleep.

Please dont send me no more creeps.

Please just send me one good man.

One without a wedding band.



One good man whos sweet as pie.

Who brushed his teeth and doesnt lie.

Who dresses neat and doesnt smell.

And is sexy like my man Denzel.

Is super-rich like Michael J.

On second thought, thats okay.



Man, if I should die before I wake,

that would truly take the cake;

No matrimony or honeymoon.

No fancy reception planned for June.

No throwing of the wedding bouquet.

Please, God, dont let me go out that way.

If I die before I meet Mr. Right

I wont go out without a fight.

But then again with my luck,

Hed probably be just some schmuck.



The single life is not that bad

I know its just a passing fad.

I wont be blue. I will not frown.

Besides, I like my toilet seat down.

No more makeup, wont comb my hair.

So never mind this stupid prayer.



The single life will do just fine.

So whats up, girlfriend?

ITS PARTY TIME!!!!