Old and New Jokes

So here I sit, in all my glory…
Lend me an ear, and Ill tell ya a story…
Once had a wife–she was such a dear,
Then came AOL, and it all disappeared!Now there she sits, for hours on end…
dont care where Im goin, dont care where Ive been.
It could be two, or it could be nine…
she really doesnt care, long as shes online.She gets off of work and rushes home,
She comes in screaming at me, Get off the phone!
Where the hells my hug? Where is my kiss?
But shes at the computer–thats all she missed!Talking to buddies, checking the mail
All her priorities–Im in cyber Hell!!
My stomachs growling–its so unfair!
No clean dishes and Im out of underwear!Drink me a beer, stare at the walls
Ill pick at my teeth while Im scratching my balls
Farting and burping all while I pee
Can you believe shes there?? She could be with ME!!