Old and New Jokes

Never trust a dog to watch your food. When your dad is mad and asks you, Do I look stupid? dont answer. Never tell your mom her diets not working. Stay away from prunes.Never pee on an electric fence. Dont squat with your spurs on.Dont pull dads finger when he tells you to. When your mom is mad at your dad, dont let her brush your hair. Never allow your three-year old brother in the same room as your school assignment. Dont sneeze in front of mum when youre eating crackers. Puppies still have bad breath even after eating a Tic-Tac. Never hold a dust buster and a cat at the same time. You cant hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk. Dont wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts. If you want a kitten, start out by asking for a horse. Felt markers are not good to use as lipstick. Dont pick on your sister when shes holding a baseball bat. When you get a bad grade in school, show it to your mom when shes on the phone. Never try to baptize a cat.