The Best Hotels

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(This joke is best told and not read. It helps if you can do dialects.)

Time: late 1940s

Place: New York

There were these two elderly Jewish gentlemen visiting the Big Apple
when they decided it was getting late and they needed to find a room
for the night. As they passed one hotel, one man says to the other, Why
dont we try this one? The other says, Are you crazy? It says on the
sign that this is a restricted hotel. You know what that means? It
means they dont let Jews in! To which the first man replies,
Restricted, reschmicted. Lets go in and have a little fun. Just
let me do all the talking.

So the two men enter and approach the desk clerk.

Man: (in thick Yiddish accent) We want a room!

Clerk: (Flustered. With a Connecticut clench) Im sorry, but this
is a RESTRICTED hotel. We do NOT allow Jewish people to stay here.

Man: What makes you think Im Jewish? Im just as Christian as you are!
Come on, ask me a Christion question!

The clerk decides to amuse him.

Clerk: OK. OK. Where was Jesus born?

Man: Such a question! Everybody knows that Jesus was born in a stable.
Come on, ask me another Christian question!

Clerk: (Impatient) Look. I know you are Jewish and you are not staying
here!

Man: Come on, ask me a question. Ask me, What for was Jesus born in a
stable!

Clerk: (visibly angry) All right! Why was Jesus born in a stable!?

Man: Because a schmuck like you wouldnt give his mother a room either!

Jeff David


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