Things you dont want to hear during surgery:

Better save that. Well need it for the autopsy.

Someone call the janitor – were going to need a mop

Accept this sacrifice, O Great Lord of Darkness

Spot! Spot! Come back with that! Bad Dog!

Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then whats that?

Hand me that…uh…that…uh…..thingie

Oh no! I just lost my Rolex.

Oops! Hey, has anyone ever survived 500ml of this stuff before?

Damn, there go the lights again…

Ya know, theres big money in kidneys. Hell, the guys got two of em.

Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens!

Could you stop that thing from beating; its throwing my concentration off.

What do you mean he wasnt in for a sex change…!

Anyone see where I left that scalpel?

This patient has already had some kids, am I correct?

Nurse, did this patient sign the organ donor card?

Dont worry; I think its sharp enough.

What do you mean You want a divorce!

Shes gonna blow! Everyone take cover!!!

FIRE! FIRE! Everyone get out of here!