Brenda OMalley is home making dinner as usual, when Tim Finnegan arrives at her door.

Brenda, may I come in? he asks. Ive somethin to tell ya.

Of course you can come in. Youre always welcome, Tim.

But wheres my husband?

Thats what Im here to be tellin ya, Brenda. There was an accident down at the Guinness brewery.

Oh, God no! cries Brenda. Please dont tell me…

I must, Brenda. Your husband Shamus is dead and gone. Im sorry.

Finally, she looked up at Tim. How did it happen, Tim?

It was terrible, Brenda. He fell into a vat of Guinness Stout and drowned.

Oh my dear Jesus! But you must tell me true, Tim. Did he at least go quickly?

Well, no Brenda, no.

No?

Fact is, he got out three times to pee.