LYRICS:

Simply take one word or phrase from each of the three columns below, in order to make one line. Repeat randomly four times. Repeat process again twice to make chorus. Repeat last line 17 times. Dont worry if they dont make sense.

Column 1Column 2Column 3
Move itTriple BeatThe City Streets
Get UpBody HeatYoull be Humpin
Pump It UpFeel the BeatBefore the Night is Over
Get DownGet AroundShake your Meat
Shake itThe Joint Is JumpinBustin Loose
Pump the JamFeet are StompinDisco Heat

BACKBEAT:

Program a drum machine in neverending 4/4 time. Add occasional snare.

BODY:

Add monotonous bass in one key. Overlay with punchy sounding synth. Get previously unknown singer to talk the lyrics so as not to test the range of the vocal chords.

PRODUCTION:

Put above ingredients together on master tape. Press discs. Give the label a suitably techno-funk sounding name, like Mixmastermeatbeaters. Sell 5 million copies to unsuspecting public. Win MTV Award.

The sad thing is the public will think youve been creative…

Better still, this process can be automated via a lyric C program, a random synth base and music generator, and the discs mastered directly by computer control.

This relieves the composer of decisions regarding which phrases and notes to use in production. By pressing the {RET} key, more than 100 CDs a week can be generated.

This I have done, below is a sample composition guaranteed to make megabucks:

Get down by Mixmastermeatbeaters

Get down the joint is jumpin youll be humpin Shake it feet are stompin in the city streets Pump the jam feel the beat with disco heat Move it get around til the night is over

(chorus) Get down to triple beat shake your meat Pump it up get around in the city streets

Pump the jam to triple beat youll be humpin Shake it get body heat til the night is over Get up the joint is jumpin youll be humpin Pump it up feet are stompin Im bustin loose

(chorus) Get down to triple beat shake your meat Pump it up get around in the city streets

Pump it up get around in the city streets Pump it up get around in the city streets Pump it up get around in the city streets etc…