How to use an ATM machine…


1. Drive up to cash machine.

2. Wind down your car window

3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN

4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw

5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt

6. Wind up window

7. Drive off.


1. Drive up to cash machine

2. Reverse back the required amount to align car window to machine

3. Re-start stalled engine

4. Wind down the window

5. Find handbag, remove all contents onto passenger seat to locate card

6. Locate make-up bag and check make-up in rear view mirror

7. Attempt to insert card into machine

8. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from car

9. Insert card

10. Re-insert card the right way up

11. Re-enter handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page

12. Enter PIN

13. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN

14. Enter amount of cash required

15. Re-check make-up in rear view mirror

16. Retrieve cash and receipt

17. Empty handbag again to locate purse and put cash inside

18. Place receipt in back of cheque book

19. Re-check make-up again

20. Drive forward two metres

21. Reverse back to cash machine

22. Retrieve card

23. Re-empty handbag, locate card holder and place card into the slot provided

24. Re-check make-up

25. Re-start stalled engine and move off

26. Drive for 3 – 4 miles

27. Release hand brake

Most viewed Jokes (20)