I clean my house according to some simple principles that are easy to remember:

If you have just stepped on something and danced around in pain until you slipped on a magazine, it is probably time to pick up again.

If you find your scissors by feeling around your dining room table until you feel something hard of the correct shape, its time to clear off a few things.

If you need a gas mask to open your fridge, you might think about throwing away some of those leftovers.

If you drop your comb in the bathroom and you pick it up with more hair than is currently attached to your head, its time to sweep.

If the neighbors are circulating a petition about the state of your yard, you might consider cutting the grass – but only if youve failed to buy them off with a doll dress or two.

When sorting newspaper, ask yourself if anyone asked for it in the last six months (or the last time you sorted, whichever comes later). If no one has, throw it out.

If your feet stick walking across the kitchen floor, its time to mop.

If it takes more than 20 minutes to find your kids when you wake them up in the morning, its time to have them clean their rooms – use new doll dresses or Power Ranger stuff as incentives.

If you havent seen the floor of your car for a week because of the Happy Meal litter on the floor and wash me is written in the dust on the outside of the car, its time to take the hint.