Three Texas plastic surgeons were playing golf together and discussing surgeries they had performed.

One of them said, Im the best plastic surgeon in Texas. A concert pianist lost 7 fingers in an accident, I reattached them, and 8 months later he performed a private concert for the Queen of England.

One of the others said. Thats nothing. A young man lost both arms and legs in an accident, I reattached them, and 2 years later he won a gold medal in 5 field events in the Olympics.

The third surgeon said, You guys are amateurs. Several years ago a cowboy who was high on cocaine and alcohol rode a horse head-on into a train traveling 80 miles an hour. All I had left to work with was the horses ass and a cowboy hat. Now hes president of the United States.