09
Jul

The Bar Bet

(Its an oldie, but a goodie.)

There was this guy who went into a bar. He went up to
the bartender and said, Bartender, are you a bettin man?

The bartender replied, Certainly! Im ALWAYS a bettin
man! To which the man said, Ill bet you $50 that I can
lick my right eye.

The bartender thought about this a while
and finally agreed to the bet. The man reached up and pulled
out his glass right eye and licked it. The bartender groaned
and begrudgingly gave the man his $50 telling him to leave
his bar.

A week or so later, the same man appeared in the bar. He went
up to the bartender and said, Bartender, are you still a bettin
man? The bartender replied, Certainly! I told you Im ALWAYS
a bettin man! To which the man said, Ill bet you $100 that
I can bite my left eye.

Well, the bartender thought he had
him on this one! There was no way that he had TWO glass eyes
so the bartender agreed. The man reached up to his mouth, pulled
out his dentures and clicked them on his left eye. The bartender
moaned and paid the man his $100 telling him to get out of his
bar.

A week or so later, the same man ventured into the bar again.
He went up to the bartender and said, Bartender, are you still
a bettin man? The bartender said, although with a little
caution this time, Certainly! I told you Im ALWAYS a bettin
man! To which the man said, Give me a shot of whiskey.
The bartender poured the man a shot and he drank it down. Slamming
the glass on the bar he said, Ill bet you $500 that you can
spin me around on this bar stool and I can piss in that glass
right where it lays and not miss a drop.

Well, the bartenders
eyes lit up. Here was one time that he was certain that he
would win! Agreed! he cried. Coming out from around the bar,
he grabbed onto the mans bar stool and spun it as hard as he could.

Well, the man just let loose and piss flew EVERYPLACE! Not so
much as one drop even came close to the glass and the bartender
was soaked. When he was done, the bartender was laughing and
laughing and holding out his hand. The man pulled out his wallet and
gave him his $500. But the bartender was puzzled and as he was wiping
off his face, he asked the man, Why did you bet me $500 that you could
piss in that shot glass on the bar when you had to have known there
wasnt any possible way to do it??

The man just smiled and told him,
You may have won $500 off me but I bet that guy over in the
corner $10,000 that I could piss all over you and your bar
and you would just laugh!

Ed Nieters
Purdue University

Most viewed Jokes (20)