Old Jokes | New Jokes

Im sure you can substitute any college name you want into these and you will get the same results!!!

How many UCLA alumni does it take to change a light bulb?



One to crack the whip and make his bitches do it for him…





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How many UC San Diego students does it take to change a lightbulb?

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Two: one to mix the margaritas and one to call the electrician.

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How many UC Santa Cruz students does it take to change a lightbulb?

Eleven: one to change the lightbulb and ten to share the experience.





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How many UC Davis students does it take to change a lightbulb?

None: Davis doesnt have electricity.





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How many UC San Francisco students does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two: one to change the lightbulb and one to crack under the pressure.





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How many UC Santa Barbara students does it take to change a lightbulb?

Only one, but he gets six credits for it.





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How many UC Berkeley students does it take to change a lightbulb?

Seventy-six: one to change the lightbulb, fifty to protest the lightbulbs right not to change, and twenty-five to hold a counter-protest.





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How many UC Irvine students does it take to change a lightbulb?

None: Irvine looks better in the dark (ditto Riverside).





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How many UCLA students does it take to change a lightbulb?

One: he just holds the bulb and lets the world revolve around him.