12
Mar

Whats Your Business Sign?

Instead of Astrological Signs, how about these .. Whats Your Business
Sign?

Marketing

You are ambitious yet stupid. You chose a marketing degree to avoid
having to study in college, concentrating instead on drinking and
socializing which is pretty much what your job responsibilities are now.
Least compatible with Sales.

Sales

Laziest of all signs, often referred to as marketing without a
degree.
You are also self-centered and paranoid. Unless someone calls you and
begs you to take their money, you like to avoid contact with customers
so you can concentrate on the big picture. You seek admiration for
your golf game throughout your life.

Technology

Unable to control anything in your personal life, you are instead
content to completely control everything that happens at your workplace.
Often even YOU dont understand what you are saying but who the hell can
tell. It is written that Geeks shall inherit the Earth.

Engineering

One of only two signs that actually studied in school. It is said that
engineers place ninety percent of all Personal Ads. You can be happy
with yourself; your office is full of all the latest ergodynamic
gadgets. However, we all know what is really causing your carpal tunnel
syndrome.

Accounting

The only other sign that studied in school. You are mostly immune from
office politics. You are the most feared person in the organization;
combined with your extreme organizational traits, the majority of rumors
concerning you say that you are completely insane.

Human Resources

Ironically, given your access to confidential information, you tend to
be the biggest gossip within the organization. Possibly the only other
person that does less work than marketing, you are unable to return any
calls today because you have to get a haircut, have lunch AND then mail
a letter.

Management/Middle Management

Catty, cutthroat, yet completely spineless, you are destined to remain
at your current job for the rest of your life. Unable to make a single
decision you tend to measure your worth by the number of meetings you
can schedule for yourself. Best suited to marry other Middle
Managers
as everyone in your social circle is a Middle Manager.

Senior Management

(See above – Same sign, different title)

Customer Service

Bright, cheery, positive, you are a fifty-cent cab ride from taking your
own life. As children very few of you asked your parents for a little
cubicle for your room and a headset so you could pretend to play
Customer Service. Continually passed over for promotions, your best
bet is to sleep with your manager.

Consultant

Lacking any specific knowledge, you use acronyms to avoid revealing your
utter lack of experience. You have convinced yourself that your
skills
are in demand and that you could get a higher paying job with any other
organization in a heartbeat. You will spend an eternity contemplating
these career opportunities without ever taking direct action.

Recruiter, Headhunter

As a person that profits from the success of others, most people
who
actually work for a living disdain you. Paid on commission and
susceptible to alcoholism, your ulcers and frequent heart attacks
correspond directly with fluctuations in the stock market.

Partner, President, CEO

You are brilliant or lucky. Your inability to figure out complex systems
such as the fax machine suggests the latter.

Government Worker

Paid to take days off. Government workers are genius inventors, like the
invention of new Holidays. They usually suffer from deep depression or
anxiety and usually commit serious crimes while on the job…Thus the
term Go Postal

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