Dont take offense, ladies, this is a list for humor, after all. I mean, its not like its about smokers or anything. Besides, Im sure one of yall could come up with a list like this for the penis. Too bad the first one wouldnt apply, though.

The more people use it the bigger it gets.
If you play with it too much you can go blind.
You would not *believe* the things people put in there!
Some people think they know how to move around in it, but they really cant interface.
In the long-distant past, its only purpose was to receive information considered vital to the survival of the species. Some people still think thats the only thing it should be used for, but most folks today use it for fun most of the time.
It has no conscience and no memory. Left to its own devices, it will just do the same damn dumb things it did before.
It provides a way to interact with other people. Some people take this interaction very seriously, others treat it as a lark. Sometimes its hard to tell what kind of person youre dealing with until its too late.
If you dont apply the appropriate protective measures, it can spread viruses.
It has no brain of its own. Instead, it uses yours. If you use it too much, youll find it becomes more and more difficult to think coherently.
You think youre just playing around, but you can get involved in something that takes 9 months to finish.
The part you see is actually just the front end of a very complicated system.
If youre not careful what you do with it, it can get you in big trouble.
It has its own agenda. Somehow, no matter how good your intentions, it will warp your behavior. Later you may ask yourself why on earth did I do that?
Some folks have it, some dont.

Those who have it think that those who dont have it are somehow inferior.
Those who dont have it may agree that its a nifty toy, but think its not worth the fuss that those who do have it make about it. Still, many of those who dont have it spend all their time trying to access it.

Once youve started playing with it, its hard to stop. Some people would just play with it all day if they didnt have work to do.
Some people believe in security and avoiding penetration but others believe it should be open to all comers.
Both are subject to abuse by hardware dongles.

Note: I didnt write this. I have no idea what a dongle is.