Old and New Jokes

12 Tips From Workforce to Managers



1. Never give me work in the morning. Always wait until 5:00 and then bring it to me. The challenge of a deadline is refreshing.





2.If its really a rush job, run in and interrupt me every 10 minutes to inquire how its going. That helps.





3.Always leave without telling anyone where youre going. It gives me a chance to be creative when someone asks where you are.





4. If my arms are full of papers, boxes, books or supplies, dont open the door for me. I need to learn how to function as a paraplegic and this is good training.





5. If you give me more that one job to do, dont tell me which is the priority. Let me guess.





6. Do your best to keep me late. I like the office and really have nowhere to go or anything to do. Beside, having no life will help prepare me for making partner.





7. If a job I do pleases you, keep it a secret. Leaks like that could cost me a promotion.





8. If you dont like my work, tell everyone. I like my name to be popular in conversation.





9. If you have special instructions for a job, dont write them down. In fact, save them until the job is almost done.





10.Never introduce me to the people youre with. When you refer to them later, my shrewd deduction powers will identify them.





11. Be nice to me only when the job Im doing for you could really change your life.





12. Tell me all your little problems. None of us have any and its nice to know someone is less fortunate.