My husband, my kids, and I were on vacation in a quaint resort town. There was a local there who gave carriage rides to sightseers. He had his horse parked outside the ice cream parlor as I was exiting with my husband and my four old daughter.

Now, I am embarrassed to say this, but this horse was experiencing an erection, and my daughter was fascinated.

As a bunch of tourists gathered around the horse, feeding and petting him, my daughter yelled out, Daddy! This horse has a penis – like you!

I was mortified until I noticed that the women in the crown seemed to be staring at me with envy.