A quite sobered up drunk is at Sunday mass listening to a long boring
sermon. Feeling still hungover and tired he finally nods out hoping
no one will notice. The priest has been watching him all along and at
the end of the sermon decides to make an example out of him.

Who in this room would like a place in heaven please stand up
he exclaims. The whole room stands up except of course for one. Obviously
displeased he now says loudly, and he who would like to find a place in hell
please STAND UP. The man catching only the last part, groggily stands up
only to find that hes the only one standing up. Confused and embarrassed
he says, I dont know what were voting on here father but sure seems like
you and me are the only ones standing for it.