Old and New Jokes

Q: Whats the difference between sin and shame?



A: It is a sin to put it in, but its a shame to pull it out.





Q: Whats the speed limit of sex?



A: 68; at 69 you have to turn around.





Q: Whats the ultimate rejection?



A: When youre masturbating and your hand falls asleep.





Q: Why did Raggedy Ann get thrown out of the toy box?



A: Because she kept sitting on Pinocchios face, and moaning, Lie to me!





Q: Why is air a lot like sex?



A: Because its no big deal unless youre not getting any.





Q: If there is H2O on the inside of a fire hydrant, what is on the outside?



A: K9P.





Q: What did the egg say to the boiling water?



A: How can you expect me to get hard so fast? I just got laid a minute ago.





Q: What did the potato chip say to the battery?



A: If youre Eveready, Im Frito Lay.





Q: Whats another name for pickled bread?



A: Dill-dough