Old and New Jokes

adenoids…..(n) Space critters whut are keepin Elvis alive on Pluto

anasthesia…(n) Rushun princess yall red bout in skool.

antacid……(n) aloosinagenic drugs uzed by itty bitty bugz.

bowel……..(n) A alfabit letter lyke A, E, I, O, or U or why?

bronchitis…(n) dinosour frum the plastikseen age; extinked.

catscan……(v) lukin fer hookers (don yall do this)

cauterize….(v) makin eye contak with a hooker (berry dangerous)

d & c……..(n) Warshingtun; whar the weirdos, purvurts, & kongress type peepul live.

emema……..(n) sumone who aint never no frend no how

fester…….(n) yer unkles name (mos likelee)

genital……(n) head of a army, fer sample, Genital Robert E. Lee

heart……..(v) when u cauz pain to some1

hypodermic…(n) huge, big, fat zoo crittur; mostly live in de woter

mamogram…..(n) short note sent 2 yer ma er other female

papsmear…..(v) when peepul sez veri ugli things bout yer pappy

recovery…..(n) place wear yew fix up yer fernitur

rectum…….(v) whut happenz when yew drive yer pick up truck drunk

seizure……(n) Emperore of Rome.

series…….(n) tv continuin show, fer sample, Gomer Pyle, U.S.M.C.

testicles….(n) books of the Bible

tumor……..(n) how many beers yew can drink after last call

urine……..(v) xact oppisyte of yerrout