Advice To Women From Men

Never buy a new brand of beer because it was on sale.
If were in the backyard and the TV in the den is on, that doesnt mean were not watching it.
Dont tell anyone we cant afford a new car. Tell them we dont want one.
Whenever possible, please try to say whatever you have to say during commercials.
Dont feel compelled to tell us how all the people in your little stories are related to one another: Were just nodding, waiting for the punch line.
The quarterback who just got pummeled isnt trying to be brave, hes just not crying. Big difference.
When the waiter asks if everythings okay, a simple Yes will do.
What do you mean, leering? Shes obstructing my view.
The temperature in the cave will be my responsibility. It will be slightly to moderately cooler than you want it.
SportsCenter starts at 11:00 P.M. and runs one hour. This is an excellent time for you to pay bills, put laundry in the dryer or talk to your sister.
If we see you in the morning and at night, why call us at work?
Two hot dogs and a beer at a baseball game do, in fact, constitute going out to dinner.
You probably dont want to know what were thinking about.
Silence does not need to be filled.
Its in neither your interest nor ours to take the Cosmo quiz together.
No, you cant have the remote control.

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