A blonde was feeling so depressed that she decided to end her life by throwing herself into Lake Erie. She went down to the docks and was about to leap into the frigid water when a handsome young sailor saw her teetering on the edge of the pier, crying. He took pity on her and said, Listen, youve got a lot to live for. Im off to Europe in the morning and if you like, I can stow you away on my ship. Ill take good care of you, and bring you food every day. Moving closer, he slipped his arm around her shoulder and added with a wink, And Ill make you happy, and you can make ME happy. The girl nodded yes through her tears. After all, what did she have to lose? That night, the sailor brought her aboard and hid her in a lifeboat, along with blankets and food. From then on, every night he brought her sandwiches, water, wine and fruit and they would make mad, passionate love until dawn. Three weeks later, during a routine inspection, she was discovered by the Captain. What the hell are you doing here? the Captain demanded angrily. I have an arrangement with one of the sailors, she explained. I get free food and a trip to Europe. Meanwhile (she says coyly), hes taking advantage of me, so to speak, (wink, wink) He sure as hell is, lady, the Captain said. This is the Hudson River ferry!