Q. Why was the blonde smiling during the lighting storm.

A. She thought she was getting her picture taken.

A businessman approached the elevator in his office building and found a blonde sitting on the floor next to the elevator doors, crying. When he inquired what was wrong, she replied my remote wont open the doors, I cant get out!. He looked down to see her holding her cars remote door opener in her hand!

I resent that remark. said the blonde as she rose from the cafeteria table. Ill give you 5 seconds to take that back.

Oh yeah? snarled the dark haired woman, who upon standing was head and shoulders above the blonde. Suppose I dont take it back in five seconds?

Well … stammered the blonde, how much time do you need?

A blonde and a brunette were opening their paychecks when the blonde asked the brunette what she was going to buy. The brunette replied, "I think Ill buy a new set of plates because mine are chipped. What are you going to buy?" The blonde said, "I think Im gonna buy a new butt, because my old one has an enormous crack in it."

A blonde and a brunette were discussing their boyfriends:

Brunette: Last night I had *three* orgasms in a row !!

Blonde: Thats nothing; last night I had over hundred.

Brunette: My god ! I had no idea he was that good.

Blonde: (looking shocked) oh, you meant with one guy. . .

There was a blonde that was so sick of blonde jokes she died her hair red. The jokes stopped and she felt so good, she took a ride in the country one Saturday afternoon. While on this ride, she noticed a flock of sheep and stopped the car to take in their beauty. She noticed the farmer just standing there watching too. She walked up to him asked some questions on raising sheep. She then asked, If I can guess how many sheep are in your flock, can I have one? The farmer agreed. She guessed, 387. The farmer said that was correct. So, go take your pick on which one you want. She went into the flock and then to her car. The farmer stopped her, and asked, If I can guess what your natural hair color is, can I have my DOG back?

Question: Where do you see blonde, brunette, blonde, brunette, blonde…

Answer: A naked blonde doing cartwheels!

A highway patrolman stopped a blonde who had been driving at a high rate of speed. He told her that she had been driving 90 miles an hour.

She exclaimed, Why officer, thats impossible! I only left my house about thirty minutes ago!

Did ya hear about the blonde who brought a bag of frozen french fries to a poker game?

Someone told her to bring her own chips.

There were 3 blondes who found a jeanie. He granted each of them a wish. The first wished she was 50% smarter – poof shes a BRUNETTE, the second wished she was 25% smarter – poof shes a REDHEAD, the third wished she was 50% dumber – poof shes a BLOND MAN.