A man asked a blonde what she thought about blonde jokes. She replied, I think they are good but they might be offensive to some mexicans."

A: You dont. Theyre born that way.

Once there was a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. They decided to make their very own record and they plan to make it on MTV some day. After years and years of practice they called in and asked to perform. They had to prove they were good enough so the mailed the host of MTV a video. A few days later they all found out they did make it to MTV so they rehearsed plenty of times and had everything going perfect. They were going to be the greatest performers ever. After driving for about 20 hours they were tired but still planned to be great the next day. They arrived on the set of MTV to perform. The blonde was suppose to be in charge of the drumrole when the host said to do so. He said,Ladies and gentlemen, listen up for the new pop stars of 2002. Then opened an envelope and said Could I get a drumrole please? So the blonde picked up the drum, roled it across the stage and hit the host and killed him therefor they were not excepted to perform anywhere else and were locked up for a cuople years.

lesson:if you want a career, dont kill your boss or any hosts!!!

Once there was a blonde who got DARNED sick and tired of those jokes mocking blondes for a low I.Q.

She therefore resolved to prove that blonds could be as smart as anyone else. She spent several weeks studiously peering at a map…

The next time some one attempted to tell a Blonde Joke, she riposted
Well, Im a blonde and Im NOT stupid! Ill have you know Ive memorized the Capitals of every state in the union!

So whats the capital of Vermont? inquired a sceptic.

The blonde giggled: Thats easy! V ……..

There was a blonde driving down the center of the road at 100 mph. A police officer pulled her over to the side of the road. When she had stopped, the officer asked, License and Registration please.



Its okay, Officer, I have a special license that allows me to do this, she said smiling.



Thats impossible! The officer replied, Ive never heard of such a license.



The blonde then reached into her purse and handed him her license. Astonished, the Officer said, Just as I suspected. This is an ordinary license, I see nothing here that would allow you special consideration.



She pointed to the bottom of the license, See? it says so right here: Tear Along The Dotted Line.

Two blondes were stranded on an iceberg with only a telescope. One of the blondes was looking through the telescope and said, Were saved! Look, its the Titanic!

B. J.

Q: How do you get a blonde to marry you?

A: Tell her shes pregnant.

Q: What will she ask you?

A: Is it mine?

In a fancy Paris restaurant, there is a magical wish-granting mirror. But it only grants wishes if you tell the truth — if you lie, you disappear. One day, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead enter the restaurant and decide to try out the mirror. The brunette goes first."I think Im the smartest woman on earth." "POOF!" She disappears. The redhead goes up to try.p>"I think Im the prettiest woman on earth.""POOF!" She disappears. The blonde goes up."I think–""POOF!"

An overweight blonde consulted her doctor for advice.

The doctor advised that she run 10 miles a day for 30 days.

This, he promised, would help her lose as much as twenty pounds.

The blonde follows the doctors advice, and, after thirty days, she was pleased to find that shed indeed lost twenty pounds.

She phoned the doctor and thanked him for the wonderful advice which produced such effective results. At the end of the conversation, however, she asked one last question:

How do I get home, since I am now 300 miles away?