Yuppie pregnant women dont go into labor, they go straight into management.

A coup that is known in advance is a coup that does not take place.

Andreas Admonition: Never bestow profanity upon a driver who has wronged you. If you think his window is closed and he cant hear you, it isnt and he can.

It is important to keep an open mind, but not so open that your brains fall out.

The floggings will continue until morale improves.

If ignorance is bliss, why arent there more happy people?

Experience is directly proportional to the amount of equipment ruined.

Error is often more earnest than truth.

Most projects require three hands.

Real programmers argue with the systems analyst as a matter of principle.