I have run out of sick leave, so Im calling in dead.

The worse your line is tangled, the better is the fishing around you.

Clovis Consideration of an Atmospheric Anomaly: The perversity of nature is nowhere better demonstrated than by the fact that, when exposed to the same atmosphere, bread becomes hard while crackers become soft.

Belles Constant: The ratio of time involved in work to time available for work is about 0.6. – from a 1977 JIR article of the same title by Daniel McIvor and Olsen Belle, in which it is observed that knowledge of this constant is most useful in planning long-range projects. It is based on such things as an analysis of an eight hour workday in which only 4.8 hours are actually spent working (or 0.6 of the time available), with the rest being spent on coffee breaks, bathroom visits, resting, walking, fiddling around, and trying to determine what to do next.

It takes a big man to admit when hes wrong, and an even bigger one to keep his mouth shut when hes right.

Go where the money is.

The number of people watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your action.

A pipe gives a wise man time to think and a fool something to put in his mouth.

Cop-out number 1. You should have seen it when I got it.

Grays Law of Programming: n+1 trivial tasks are expected to be accomplished in the same time as n tasks.