Q: How many Israelis does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Six–four to storm the room and take control of it, one to forcibly eject the old bulb, and another one to screw it in.

Q: How many politicians does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Four, one to change it and the other three to deny it.

Q: How many Republican Presidential candidates from 1988 did it take to change a lightbulb?
A: (Dole) When I was a poor boy growing up in Kansas we didnt have light bulbs. Now I have the housekeeper do it.

Q: How many rec.humor readers does it take to change a lightbulb ?
A: 100-one to announce that it burned out, 10 to agree, 20 to come running in with new light bulbs and screw them in, 9 to screw them in and leave the old bulb in, 10 to ask for a videotape of the screwing, another one to come in a few minutes later and notice the bulb went out again and start the whole process all over again. And one (me!) to notice that this doesnt actually add up to 100.

Q: How many [members of your favorite group] does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: Two, but they have to be *really tiny*.

Why did God invent lesbians?

So feminists wouldnt breed.





Why did the woman cross the road?

Thats not the point,whats she doing out of the kitchen?





What do you do if your dishwasher breaks down?

Kick her in the butt





How many divorced Women does it take to screw in a light bulb?

4,1 to screw in the bulb, 3 to form a support group.





How many women does it take to change a light bulb?

11, 10 to form a committee and 1 to get her boyfriend to do it..





What is the difference between a battery and a woman?

A battery has a positive side.





Did you hear about the guy who finally figured out women?

He died laughing before he could tell anybody.





Why do men pass gas more than women?

Because women wont shut up long enough to build up pressure.

Q: How many Meredith students does it take to change a light bulb?

A: Five – two to write a song, two to make a t-shirt, and one to change it.

Five: One to hold the bulb, and four to guzzle beer until the
room spins.

How many government agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There never was any light bulb. All you saw was a reflection from swamp gas.

How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to turn it in and four to form a support group and blame the whole thing on men in the first place.