Q: Why dont statisticians like to model new clothes?
A: Lack of fit.

Some statisticians dont drink because they are t-test totalers. Others drink the hard stuff as evidenced by the proliferation of box-and-whiskey plots.

Q: How do you tell one bathroom full of statisticians from another?
A: Check the p-value.

Joke found on http://www.ahajokes.com

:

Mathmatician — 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, the rest follows by induction.

Statistician — 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is expermental error so throw it out, 11 is prime, 13 is prime, the rest follows by induction.

Computer Scientist — 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is prime, ….

Theorem: e=1
Proof:
2*e = f
2^(2*pi*i)e^(2*pi*i) = f^(2*pi*i)
e^(2*pi*i) = 1

Therefore:
2^(2*pi*i) = f^(2*pi*i)
2=f
Thus:
e=1

Q: Why did the mathematicians pen run out of ink?
A: Because he was writing in recursive.

Q: How many statisticians does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: 1-3, alpha = .05

Q: What do you get when you cross a sherpa and a mountain goat?
A: Nothing. you cant cross two scalars.

Q: Why couldnt the negative pair square things away?
A: Because they had complex issues!

A mathematician, applied mathematician and a statistician all apply for the same job. At the interview they are asked the question, what is 1+1. The mathematician replies, I can prove that it exists but not that it is unique. The applied mathematician after some thought replies, the answer is approximately 1.99 with an error in the region of 0.01. The statistician steps outside the room, mulls it over for several minutes, and eventually in desparation returns and inquires, so what do you want it to be?