Why do we sing Take me out to the ball game, when we are already there?

Xerox does it again and again and again and…

For the man who has everything. . .
A calendar to remind
him when his payments are due.

Two wrongs dont make a right but three lefts do.

Question: Why did they let the turkey join the band?

Answer: Because he had his own drumsticks!

Where did Vincent Van Gogh?

Im defending her honor, which is more than she ever did.

How can one believe in survival of the fittest when you look at
some of the people running around in jogging shorts?

Wouldnt marathons be a lot more interesting if after the race started,
hungry wild animals were released onto the course? Tigers would be
fun.

– R.M. Weiner