This is for entertainment purposes only. We do not advise that you do any of these things on the first day of class or for that matter, on any day of class.

41. Every few minutes, take a sheet of notebook paper, write Signup Sheet #5 at the top, and start passing it around the room.

42. Stand to ask questions. Bow deeply before taking your seat after the professor answers.

43. Wear a cape with a big S on it. Inform classmates that the S stands for stud.

44. Interrupt every few minutes to ask the professor, Can you spell that?

45. Disassemble your pen. Accidently propel pieces across the room while playing with the spring. Go on furtive expeditions to retrieve the pieces. Repeat.

46. Wink at the professor every few minutes.

47. In the middle of lecture, ask your professor whether he believes in ghosts.

48. Laugh heartily at everything the professor says. Snort when you laugh.

49. Wear a black hooded cloak to class and ring a bell.

50. Ask your math professor to pull the roll chart above the blackboard of ancient Greek trade routes down farther because you cant see Macedonia.

These are intended for entertainment purposes only. We do not advise that you ever do these things to a roommate or yourself.

97. Buy a plant. Sleep with it at night. Talk to it. After a few weeks, start to argue with it loudly. Then yell, I cant live in the same room with you, storm out of the room and slam the door. Get rid of the plant, but keep the pot. Refuse to discuss the plant ever again.

These are intended for entertainment purposes only. We do not advise that you ever do these things to a roommate or yourself.

2. Switch the sheets on your beds while s/he is at class.

These are intended for entertainment purposes only. We do not advise that you ever do these things to a roommate or yourself.

70. Let mice loose in his/her room.

These are actual student evaulation comments taken from an MIT course evaluation guide in the fall semester of 1991.

This class was a religious experience for me… I had to take it all on faith.

Text makes a satisfying thud when dropped on the floor.

The class is worthwhile because I need it for the degree.

His blackboard technique puts Rembrandt to shame.

Textbook is confusing… Someone with a knowledge of English should proofread it.

Have you ever fell asleep in class and awoke in another? Thats the way I felt all term.

In class I learn I can fudge answers and get away with it.

Keep lecturer or tenure board will be shot.

The recitation instructor would make a good parking lot attendant. Tries to tell you where to go, but you can never understand him.

Text is useless. I use it to kill roaches in my room.

In class the syllabus is more important than you are.

I am convinced that you can learn by osmosis by just sitting in his class.

Help! Ive fallen asleep and I cant wake up!

Problem sets are a decoy to lure you away from potential exam material.

Recitation was great. It was so confusing that I forgot who I was, where I was, and what I was doing — its a great stress reliever.

He is one of the best teachers I have had… He is well-organized, presents good lectures, and creates interest in the subject. I hope my comments dont hurt his chances of getting tenure.

I would sit in class and stare out the window at the squirrels. Theyve got a cool nest in the tree.

He teaches like Speedy Gonzalez on a caffeine high.

This course kept me out of trouble from 2-4:30 on Tuesdays and Thursdays.

Most of us spent the 1st 3 weeks terrified of the class. Then solidarity kicked in.

Bogus number crunching. My HP is exhausted.

The absolute value of the TA was less than epsilon.

TA steadily improved throughout the course… I think he started drinking and it really loosened him up.

Information was presented like a ruptured fire hose — spraying in all directions — no way to stop it.

I never bought the text. My $60 was better spent on the Led Zeppelin tapes that I used more while doing the problem sets that I would have used the text.

Whats the quality of the text? Text is printed on high quality paper.

A student is taking his final exams. He takes his seat in the exam hall, stares at the questions and then in a fit of desperate inspiration, he takes his shoes off and throws them out of the window. He then removes his shirt, pants and socks.
The teacher, alarmed, approached him and asked, What in the world are you doing?!

The student answered, Im following the instructions. The test paper clearly states that we should answer the questions in brief.

The teacher came into the class one day and said, Students, todays assignment is to make a sentence using the word Omelette.

I volunteered and said That dude cussed me out but omelette it go instead of fighting about it!

These are intended for entertainment purposes only. We do not advise that you ever do these things to a roommate or yourself.

151. Watch Psycho every day for a month. Then act excited every time your roommate goes to take a shower.

10. If you can pack your worldly possesions into the back of a pick-up (one trip).

These are intended for entertainment purposes only. We do not advise that you ever do these things to a roommate or yourself.

62. Call safety and security whenever your roommate turns up his/her music.