NFL commissioner Paul Tagliabue blocked Patriots coach Bill Parcells form
switching to the New York Jets without the permission of the Patriots.
The Jets cant win, says Jay Leno. Even their coaches get intercepted.

LONDON – A baffled British woman who lost a mobile phone dialed
the number and heard it ringing inside her friends dog.

Rachel Murray, 27, had left the cellphone under her Christmas tree as a
surprise gift for her flatmate, The Sun newspaper reported on Friday.

But chum Tony Dangerfields bloodhound Charlie crept into the room and
greedily wolfed down the mobile phone, leaving only a pile of torn paper.

After a frantic search for the phone, Murray obtained the number from the
telephone company, dialed and heard muffled ringing from sleeping Charlies
stomach.

At first I thought Charlie was lying on the phone — then I realized where
it was, she said. I couldnt believe hed swallowed it.

The dog was rushed to a vet, who advised Murray and Dangerfield to let
nature take its course.

Twenty four hours later the phone duly emerged — in perfect working order.

Still, there are some things a big company can do that a small band of
programmers could never hope to accomplish. This was best shown to me
this week by reader Brian P. McLean, who points out that according to his
Microsoft Outlook 97 scheduling/datebook application, Thanksgiving falls
this year on Wednesday, November 26.

Thanksgiving has always fallen on Thursday before. Wednesday may be an
improvement. I dont know.

– Robert X. Cringely, from his I, Cringely column (November 7, 1997)

A massive cold front swept across the nation this week, but its not
expected to affect the election. Says Hamilton, The Weather Channel said
the five-day forecast for Bob Dole is three days.

In September, a 7-year- old boy fell off a 100-foot-high bluff near Ozark,
Ark., after he lost his grip swinging on a cross that marked the spot
where another person had fallen to his death in 1990.

Earlier this year, the dazed crew of a Japanese Trawler was plucked out
of the Sea of Japan clinging to the wreckage of their sunken ship.

Their rescue, however, was followed by immediate imprisonment once
authorities questioned the sailors on their ships loss. To a man they
claimed that a cow, falling out of a clear blue sky, had struck the
trawler amidships, shattering its hull and sinking the vessel within
minutes.

They remained in prison for several weeks, until the Russian Air Force
reluctantly informed Japanese authorities that the crew of one of its
cargo planes had apparently stolen a cow wandering at the edge of a
Siberian airfield, forced the cow into the planes hold and hastily taken
off for home.

Unprepared for live cargo, the Russian crew was ill-equipped to manage a
now rampaging cow within its hold. To save the aircraft and themselves,
they shoved the animal out of the cargo hold as they crossed the Sea of
Japan at an altitude of 30,000 feet.

Safeway has made a $1.7 billion offer for Vons markets. Says Bob Mills,
The amount of the bid became public after a checkout clerk was overheard
yelling Price check on the company!

He adds, the original offer was $2 billion, but then Safeway pulled out
a huge stack of double-value coupons.