Harold is 95 and lives in a senior citizen home. Every night after dinner,

Harold goes to a secluded garden behind the center to sit and ponder his

accomplishments and long life.

One evening, Mildred, age 87,wanders into the garden. They begin to chat,

and before

they know it, several hours have passed.

After a short lull in their conversation Harold turns to Mildred and asks,

Do you know

what I miss most of all?

She asks, What?

SEX! he replies. Mildred exclaims, Why you old fart, you couldnt get

it up if I held a

gun to your head!

I know, Harold says, but it would be nice if a woman could just hold it

for a while.

Well, I can oblige, says Mildred, who unzips his trousers, removes his

manhood and

proceeds to hold it. Afterward, they agree to meet secretly each night in

the garden

where they would sit and talk and Mildred would hold Harolds manhood.

Then, one night, Harold didnt show up at their usual meeting place.

Alarmed, Mildred

decided to find Harold and make sure he was O.K.

She walked around the senior citizen home where she found him sitting by the

pool with

another female resident, Ethel, who was holding Harolds manhood.

Furious, Mildred yelled, You two-timing creep! What does Ethel have that I

dont have?

Old Harold smiled happily and replied, Parkinsons.