Old and New Jokes

All those curves, and me with no brakes.



Are your legs tired? Youve been running through my mind all day long.



Bond. James Bond.



Can I borrow a quarter? I want to call my mom and tell I just met the girl of my dreams.



Can I borrow a quarter? I want to call your mother and thank her.



Can I buy you a car?



Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money?



Can I flirt with you?



Can I have directions to your heart?



Can I have your phone number? I seem to have lost mine.



Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?



Do you have a quarter? My mother told me to call home when I met the girl of my dreams.



Do you know whatd look good on you? Me.



Do you like apples? How about I take you home and screw the hell out of you, howd you like them apples?



Do you sleep on your stomach? Can I?



Do you take it up the ass?



Do you want to go out for a pizza and a screw? What, dont you like pizza?



Forget that. Playing doctor is for kids. Lets play gynecologist.



Hi, do you know why you should masturbate with these two fingers? Because theyre mine.



I may not be Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make your Bed Rock.



Roses are red, violets are blue, I like spaghetti, lets go screw



Screw me if Im wrong, but dont you want to kiss me?



Screw me if Im wrong, but is your name Yolanda?



Sex is a killer, so do you want to die happy?



That shirt looks very becoming on you, but if I were on you, Id be coming too.



Want to screw like bunnies?



I think we must make love on the front lawn like crazed weasels now.