Old and New Jokes

Step on er, boy! Yer only goin 90.
You can make it easy … that trains not coming fast.
Gimme a match … I think my gas tanks empty.
Theres plenty of life left in those tires.
No, well tune up the car in the garage so we can close the door and stay warm; the engine wont be running long.
Theres never any traffic at this intersection.
No, truckers dont mind when you pass on the right (or tailgate to draft and save gas).
Dont go to a welding shop! I can fix that leak in your gas tank with my torch.
Of course I can dial numbers and talk on my cell phone at the same time.
No, no, all bungee cords look a little frayed.
Motorcycles are supposed to wobble in turns.
You dont need ski lessons; just follow me.
Green means go, red means stop, yellow means go … very fast. (from the movie STARMAN).