Morris walks into an insurance office and asks for a job. We dont need anyone, they replied.



You cant afford not to hire me. I can sell anyone, anytime, anything.



Well we have two prospects that no one has been able to sell. If you can sell just one, you have a job. He was gone about two hours, and returned and handed them two checks – one for $25,000.00 and another for $50,000.00.



How in the world did you do that? they asked.



I told you Im the worlds best salesman. I can sell anyone, anywhere, anytime!



Did you get a urine sample? they asked him.



Whats that? he asked.



Well, if you sell a policy over $20,000.00 the company requires a urine sample. Take these two bottles and go back and get urine samples.



Morris was gone about six hours and they were fixing to close when in he walks in with two five gallon buckets, one in each hand. He sets the buckets down, and reaches in his shirt pocket and produces two bottles of urine, and sets them on the desk and says, Heres Mr. Browns and this one is Mr. Smiths.



Thats good, they said, but whats in those two buckets?



Well, I passed by the Holiday Inn and they were having a State Teachers Convention, so I stopped and sold them a group policy!