List of Funny Insults!

If you cant live without me, why arent you dead already?

Youd make a lovely corpse!

I never forget a face, but in your case Ill make an exception.

Is that a beard, or are you eating a muskrat?

Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?

Youre a wit with dunces, and a dunce with wits…huh?

Did you eat a brain tumor for breakfast?

You love nature in spite of what it did to you?

I want to reach your mind – where is it currently located?

I wish Id known you when you were alive.

If you ever had a bright idea, it would be beginners luck!

Whats on your mind? If youll forgive the overstatement.

When you go to the mind reader, do you get half price?

I look into your eyes and get the feeling someone else is driving.

Youre a mouse studying to be a rat.

Dont look now, but theres one too many in this room and I think its you.

Every time Im next to you, I get a fierce desire to be alone.

I cant believe that out of 100,000 sperm, you were the quickest!

If you ever become a mother, can I have one of the puppies?

Theres nothing wrong with you that reincarnation wont cure.

Why dont you bore a hole in yourself and let the sap run out?

Youre a good example of why some animals eat their young.

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