Mother Murphys laws
THE FRANKLIN FACTOR: Early to bed and early to rise means its time to
meet more guys.
THE RAT RACE: If theres one rat in a room full of nice men, hell hit
on you first.
THE EYEGLASS PRESCRIPTION: Dont wear your glasses on a blind date.
Youll look better, and he will too.
THE RING RULE: A watched telephone never rings.
THE CREEP CALL: Never pick up the phone on Saturday night. Its a call
from a creep you told you were busy.
THE FISHING FORECAST: They say there are lots of good fish in the sea.
But who wants to go out with a fish?
THE PSYCHOLOGICAL PROGNOSIS: Love is a form of temporary insanity
curable only by marriage.
THE ROPE TRICK: Give a man enough rope and hell lasso another woman.
MIND OVER MATTER: No one ever falls in love with another persons mind
at a cocktail party.
THE FAULT FINDER: The faster way to discover all your bad habits is to
move in with your lover.
THE UNINTENDED RESULT: 1) Mens desire for sex sometimes results in intimacy.
2) Womens desire for intimacy often results in sex.
THE RABBIT RULE: Only newlyweds and liars make love every day.
THE DANGLE DOCTRINE: You cant keep a good man down.
TWAINS TRUTH: Familiarity breeds children.
THE FERTILITY FACTOR: Women are only fertile a few days each
month…unless theyre single.
THE PREPARATION PREDICAMENT: The longer you spend in the bathroom
preparing for sex, the more likely hes fallen asleep by the time
youre ready.
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