a brick does not fallow you around two weeks after you lay it.
24
May
24
May
What is the difference between a Scottish man and a member of the Rolling Stones?
A member of the Rolling Stones says, Hey you! Get off my cloud! The Scot says, Hey McCloud, get off my ewe!
23
May
Las diez cosas que un hombre harÃa si se despertara con vagina:
10. Ir a comprar inmediatamente zanahorias y pepinos.
9. Estarse viendo con un espejo de mano por hora y media.
8. Ver si finalmente pueden hacer splits.
7. Ver si es posible lanzar una pelota de ping pong a 40 metros de distancia.
6. Cruzar las piernas sin reacomodarse la pistola.
5. Ligarse a alguien en menos de 10 minutos… ¡justo antes de cerrar el bar!
4. Tener orgasmos múltiples, uno después del otro, sin tener que dormir antes.
3. Ir al ginecólogo a examinarse y pedir que lo graben en vÃdeo.
2. Sentarse en la orilla de la cama y pedir senos también.
Y la primera cosa que un hombre harÃa si tuviera vagina serÃa…
¡Encontrar, por fin, el maldito punto G!
23
May
Un profesor va a la residencia de estudiantes para socializar más con sus alumnos. Al entrar en una habitación encuentra a un grupo de estudiantes totalmente desnudos con una prostituta con ojos vendados. La daifa se los chupa por turno y trata de adivinar el nombre de ellos por el sabor de la chupada. Los muchachos ven al profesor y le gritan:
¡Hola, profe, venga con nosotros!
¡No! ¿Cómo puede ser? Un maestro no puede hacer cosas tan denigrantes; es más, yo no soy asÃ.
¿Ah, no? ¡Ella ya tomó tres veces a alguien por usted!
23
May
A guy is getting ready to hunt when his wife asks if she can go
No way. We would be getting up early and you never know what the weather is like. I just dont think you could handle it.
Please, his wife begs, you never do anything with me.
Fine, he sats, Ill see you in the morning.
The next morning the guy wakes his wife. its four in the morning. she complains.
Thats what time we go, he says, now move it.
The wife gets out of bed and sees snow all over the ground and refuses to go.
Fine, says the husband, for making me pack double the gear and being a bitch you better suck my dick or let me fuck you in the ass.
The women abruply gets on her knees. A few seconds later she pulls her head away.
oh, your dick taste like shit.
I know, says the husband, the dog didnt want to go either.
23
May
Q: Did you hear about the statistician who took the Dale Carnegie course?
A: He improved his confidence from .95 to .99.
23
May
Marriage is an institution in which a man loses his Bachelors Degree and the woman gets her Masters.
23
May
Ive been asked to say a couple of words about my husband, Fang. How about short and cheap? — Phyllis Diller
23
May
Whats the difference between Ted Kaczynski and Monica Lewinsky?
Ted Kaczynski blows people up!
23
May
There was a blonde that lived next to a brunette. One day, the blonde was crying so the brunette went over and asked what was wrong. The blonde said, My mom just died. So the brunette comforted her all day.
The next day the blonde was crying again, so the brunette went over and asked, Whats wrong now the blonde said My sister just called… Her mom died too.