A guy goes into a bar and goes up to the bartender. He says I bet you 200 bucks I can piss in that glass in the corner and not spill a drop. The bartender agreed knowing he could never do it. So the man goes into the corner and pisses all ove everything even the bartender. So he walks back to the laughing bartender and the bartender says I knew you couldnt do it. The man replies, You can have your 200 dollars, I just bet those guys over there 2000 dollars that I could piss all over your place and you still would be laughing.

Your momma so stanky…when she passes by the toilet it flushes!!!

The new manager walks into his office and, while settling into his new desk, finds 4 envelopes. On one he finds the words open me first, and the other three are numbered 1 to 3.

He opens the first envelope and finds a letter from his predecessor saying: These three envelopes will save you a world of trouble. In case of emergency, please open these envelopes in sequential order; envelope one first, envelope two second, and envelope three third.

The manager shrugs, puts the envelopes back, and forgets about them.

Six months later, the workers go on strike. The company closes, and is losing money fast.

After a long night negotiating with the union, he remembers the 3 envelopes. Shoe opens the first one and it says: Blame me, your predecessor for everything.

Wonderful idea he thinks, and indeed it works and the crisis comes to its end. His job is saved, and everybodys happy.

A few month later, another strike hits. He goes to the drawer and opens the second envelope. It reads, Blame the government for everything.

It works like a charm, and he breathes a sigh of relief as his job is, once again, saved.

A month later the workers declare another strike. The manager goes directly to the third envelope and it reads, Prepare 4 new envelopes

A man successfully broke into a banks basement through a
street-level window, cutting himself up pretty badly in the process. He then
realized that (1) he could not get to the money from where he was, (2) he
could not climb back out the window through which he had entered, and (3) he
was bleeding pretty badly. So he located a phone and dialed 911 for help

Taxation with representation isnt so hot, either.

Joke found on http://www.randomjoke.com

This is a case of law found in a West Law digest. This is an actual
case heard by the Michigan court of appeals (Fisher v. Low, 333 N.W.2d 67)
that was recently shown to me by somebody at school (after a long time
being a software engineer I started evening law school). I thought
it was funny…you be the judge.

Knock Knock Whos there? Interupting Cow Interupt…. MOO!!

Dave: I got this great new hearing aid the other day.

Mary: Are you wearing it now?

Dave: Yup. Cost me four thousand dollars, but its top of the line.

Mary: Wow! What kind is it?

Dave: Twelve-thirty.

Ran across another silly law today. I recently discovered beer batter-fried vegetables taste mighty good. So this teetotaller went out and bought some beer. Well, my first 6-pack finally ran out so I went out today to get another, and the person manning the check-out counter at the supermarket was a high-school girl … and she had to call over someone to run the beer across the laser-reader!

I can understand how that law came about – we dont want our minors getting drunk or anything – but to not being able to hold the beer in a position for the computer to read … thats getting rediculous … So she had to call an older employee over to sell me the beer.

One day a man went hunting for ducks. When he was done he was going to his Chevy and he got a vist from The Game Warden.

The Warden said Hey Sir,what ya huntin?

The man said Ducks.

The Warden said Did ya have any luck?

He said Got 3.

The Warden said Let Me see them. The Warden stuck his finger up the ducks butt,smelled it and said This duck is from Ohio, do you have a stamp for it?

The Man gave him the stamp.

The Warden picked up the 2nd duck did the same thing and said Kentuky duck, got a stamp?

The man gave him the stamp.

The Warden did the same thing with the last duck and said Canada duck. Stamp?

The man gave him the stamp.

Then the Warden said Where you from anyway?

The man pulled down his pants and said Youre the expert, you tell me!