Redneck Logic

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Two guys who wanted to get a job at a computer company way out west decided theyd better get a college education so they could interact with intelligent people, learn to read books, think, and be contributing citizens of the global village.

They enrolled in the local junior college, and the first guy went in to see his advisor, who said, Randy, I want you to take history, math, and logic.

Whats logic? asked Randy.

Well, said the professor, Ill give you an example. Do you own a weed-eater?

Why, yes, I do, replied Randy.

OK, continued the professor, logic tells me that you have a yard!

Amazing, gushed the young rube.

And, continued the professor, since you have a yard, logic tells me that you have a house.

I do! I do! exclaimed the boy.

And, continued the professor, if you have a house, you probably have a wife. And, since you have a wife, I conclude that you are a heterosexual.

Gaaaa-lee! said Randy.

That logic is sumpn else!

He goes outside, and his friend, Buck, asks him what classes hes going to take.

Im gonna take history, math, and logic.

Whats logic? asks Buck.

OK, says Randy, Ill give you an example: Do you own a weed-eater?

Uh, no, relies Buck.

Andy pauses a bit and says Youre QUEER, aintcha?

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