The Pope calls a meeting of all the cardinals. When they have all assembled at the Vatican, he takes them into the meeting hall and states, I have some really fantastic news and some very terrible news. Of course, all the cardinals want to hear the good news first, so the Pope tells them, Jesus Christ has returned to the world. The time of judgment is at hand, and our faith in His existence is justified. After the commotion dies down a bit, one of the cardinals speaks up, asking what the terrible news is. The Pope replies, He was calling from Salt Lake City.