The Top Ten Things Youre Not About To Hear on The Enterprise

10. No, please, Data, go on. I find your list of synonyms for extinct facinating…

9. Good work, Counsellor. If you hadnt told us those aliens had hostile intent, we would have been completely fooled by their plan.

8. Jean-Luc, since the ship is in no danger at all and were not about to die, I want to tell you…

7. The…doohickey…has gone all…funny, making that gizmo light up…the one that means the warp engines are…ya know…all messed up.

6. Captains Log, Stardate…damn. Whats the date? Number One, whats today? No, I know its Tuesday, whats the date? The STARdate!

5. Tea, Lemon Zinger, iced.

4. Klingons do NOT wear frilly underwear…at least not on duty.

3. Prime Directive? We dont need no steenkin Prime Directive!

2. The aliens are locking their weapons on us…firing…a miss. Shall I open hailing frequencies so you can laugh in their faces?

1. Ah, hell, Im bored. Screw the hailing frequencies, fire at will.

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