Those who live by the sword get shot by those who dont.

I feel like Im diagonally parked in a parallel universe.

Hes not dead, hes electroencephalographically challenged.

Shes always late. Her ancestors arrived on the Juneflower.

You have the right to remain silent….Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you.

I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges.

Honk if you love peace and quiet.

Nothing is fool-proof to a sufficiently talented fool.

A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.

Atheism is a non-prophet organization.